Not that there are many of you. But, wanted to let you know that I will slow down in posting a.) because a new quarter has started but mostly, b.) I have run out of the medicines that keep me from suffering from the symptoms of heart failure. Insurance does not pay for the medications. Here in America to buy the name brand which is the only form available costs $560 a month. If we want to live in a tent, then we could afford the medication. I was sending off to Canada and getting a generic from them for $70 a month. But now, with this corona virus thing, they are not even acknowledging my order for a refill. It has been days. I’m on half a dosage now to make the medications last longer. I’ll be out this week.
Without the medications, and the symptoms have already started, I can’t walk up a small incline. I can not push a vacuum cleaner. I can not mow my grass. I can not do much of anything. It is debatable in my mind if I can even keep going to school. We’ll see how it goes. But, yea, I’ve believed in Universal Health care/insurance since I was 16 and heard Teddy Kennedy talk about it on the local radio. I really think this country needs it more now considering this virus going around. If I end up dead from this, and I doubt I will, but if, the message would be to keep pushing some form of universal health care. We are human, we all get sick, and it is only humane to be sure that everyone it taken care of. Maybe that’s mom in me, but that is how I feel.
I have called the cardiologist, and asked for whatever medications are 2nd best. My normal cardiologist got pneumonia and had to retire early. So, I have a new unnamed doctor who will be in on Monday and I hope help. I really have no clue how heart failure was treated before this new medication came along, so I do not know what to expect. That is probably part of my issue.
And no, I do not have true heart failure, but what I do have gives me symptoms of it, and it is 1000% debilitating. Frightening to put it lightly. It still has the ability to kill be because it causes my heart to be weakened. Because of the damage done by the onset of the disease my heart is already weakened, and that is why I feel symptoms already. So, I’ll be taking more naps, doing a lot less work, sitting around more… thinking more cause I can’t move around much. I pray I don’t get the virus-if I do it will kill me.
Also I know from previous experience that this not only takes a physical toll. It affects the mind as well. I got to feeling so badly that I made it through my youngest’s graduation barely, and then I drove off intending to end my life in some obscure place. What saved my life was the fact that the car broke down. I called my hero of a husband and the man came running. There is no doubt that no matter how stupid I can be, that man loves me with all this heart. I cried that whole night long…. and I knew something wasn’t right, but I had not yet realized it was a serious health issue. The condition was just beginning to present itself, sort of. So, there are actually many layers to this condition to watch out for. Enough that it has slowed me down, and affected my physical and mental health before. So, I know what the potential is here.
In the meantime, Take care, and be safe. Take this virus seriously as you would any other serious disease. Peg